If I can’t say yes assume I mean no!

And so I hear of another case of a young girl passed out drunk and being sexually assaulted, by members of a football team. There are two  differences in this case and the Steubenville, Ohio case is that these perpetrators wrote messages on this young lady, and, Audrie Pott, took her own life.  Her parents are speaking out because they don’t want her death to be in vain.  What are we teaching our sons that they believe that taking advantage of someone who can’t say yes or no is okay?  The hero-worship of athletes, even in high school gives them a god complex and they begin to feel that they can have what ever they want.  Audrie Pott was 15.  The boys who sexually assaulted her, and passed around naked pictures of her on their cell phones have been removed from the football team but not suspended from school.  It seems as if teenagers are not taking this kind of thing seriously until someone gets arrested or dies.  I wish I could say that this is something new.  That all of this is a result of modern technology and social media, or even the god-like status given to high school athletes.  This behavior, taking advantage of females is nothing new.  It’s also not new that often times the victim is blamed.  “She shouldn’t have been drinking, her dress was too short, she was a flirt, she was a slut”.  I’m so sick of that! This putting the blame on the victim and absolving the perpetrator of any responsibility is shameful. I recently had a talk with my son before he moved into his first apartment.  I said “don’t do anything that you wouldn’t want done to your sisters.”  His reaction was like “duh!  I know that mom.”  But it is easy to get caught up in the crowd mentality.  I don’t think these boys are being told that no means no, even if it started out as yes.  I know that football players, athletes spend a lot of time hyped up on adrenalin and testosterone, but somebody needs to take responsibility.  Better yet these boys need to take responsibility for themselves.  They are not as naive as they would like to appear when they say they didn’t realize they were doing anything wrong.  They know better, they just chose not to do better.  I encourage parents of teenagers to educate your boys and girls of what can happen when you are impaired.  Mothers, especially explain to your daughters that there can be consequences if you drink and pass out not the least of which is getting a “reputation”. I know that this is not a new phenomenon this boys sexually assaulting drunk girls. or timid girls or girls that have a reputation for being “that kind” of girl.  My great grandmother used to say “aint nothing new under the sun”.  She was right.  Old or new, we have go to better educate our children, boys and girls to respect each other.

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~ by Diva2de on April 20, 2013.

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