Is your cheese about to slip off your cracker?

Sometimes holding onto your sanity is a decision.  That seems like a frivolous statement.  I can say that with conviction because I have been in the position more than once where I’ve had to decide not to go crazy.  The world around us is constantly changing.  That’s nothing new.  What is different is that there are so many people who find themselves in positions that they never expected to be in.  Positions that are unsettling, unsatisfying and unchangeable.  As human beings created in the image of the Most High we have in us the desire to control and create.  So when things become unstable and unpredictable we immediately go into “damage control mode”.  Damage control mode is when we try to reason, rationalize and restructure the world around us to the point where it makes sense and is manageable.  But what happens when, despite all our efforts to fix the situation, the situation is not fixable?  It creates anxiety.  Anxiety in a natural chemical reaction to stress.  I could go into things about the sympathetic nervous system and catecholamines and all that stuff but the body’s chemical reaction to stress is not what I’m trying to get to. It is the cognitive reaction. The process of problem solving.  When your world is falling apart you can increase your anxiety by going into damage control mode, or you can accept that there are some things that you simply cannot change no matter how hard you try.  I have been on  sort of an endless merry-go-round situation for almost a year.  I’ve strategize and manipulated and maneuvered all I could to the point where I was so stressed out that the cheese was about to slip off my cracker.  That was decision-making time.  Chemically, I am prone to depression.  I’m not talking about feeling sad because something  happened or things didn’t go my way.   I’m talking about  debilitating, life impairing clinical depression for which people are medicated to balance the effected brain chemistry.  This is more than just feeling a little blue.  The situation merry-go-round certainly didn’t do anything to improve my depression prone brain.  I had to create on the spot cognitive behavior therapy for myself.  Cognitive behavior therapy is (breaking it down to its purest form like h20) changing the way of thinking that changes behavior.  Or if you want to go bible “As a (wo)man thinketh in his(her) heart so is (s)he. (Prov. 23:7). Or if you want to go philosophical “Cogito ergo sum” I think therefore I am (Descartes).  Ok the Descartes may have been a little stretch but my point (and I do have one) is this.  I had to decide not to lose my mind.  Not to sink down into despair over my situation.  How did I do that?  Faith.  Yes I know I know, “religion is the opiate of the masses”, but I’m not talking about religion.  Religion is based on ritual, I’m not talking about following some twelve steps to mental wellness or how to win friends and influence people.  I’m talking about a soul-searching survival tactics that kept me from losing my mind.  I found that solution in my faith in God.  Again I could go into all of the arguments for existence of God (teleological, cosmological and ontological) but  it’s not some high-minded thing.  It’s as basic as breathing. God is, therefore I am.  Since He is then His word is true.  Since His word is true then I can trust it.  Since I can trust His word then I know I’m not in this alone.  Since I’m not in this alone I don’t have to fear.  Since I don’t have to fear I don’t have to go into damage control mode.  And I am free to praise Him, knowing that all things work together for my good.  Even things that don’t feel good.  Whew!  This was extremely verbose I know, but if one person whose cheese is about to slip off their cracker reads this and finds peace then it did what it was supposed to do.  You don’t have to go it alone, you don’t have to lose your mind.  He is and He cares.  Trust Him


~ by Diva2de on June 7, 2012.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s